


his confidant

by storiesbysonny



Series: we don’t have to talk to click [3]
Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Ambiguous Relationships, Canon Compliant, Character Study, Crying, Cuddling & Snuggling, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Lee Donghyuck | Haechan Needs a Hug, M/M, Na Jaemin is a Good Friend, Non-Sexual Intimacy, Sad Lee Donghyuck | Haechan
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-28
Updated: 2020-11-28
Packaged: 2021-03-10 06:27:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,345
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27749734
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/storiesbysonny/pseuds/storiesbysonny
Summary: Donghyuck doesn’t have to say it, but Jaemin can tell he needs affection without the appearance of questions like: “Are you feeling okay?” or “Do you want to talk about it?” Just needs affection without feeling like he’s burdening or worrying someone else unintentionally. And Jaemin gets it.In other words, Jaemin and Donghyuck have a deep understanding of one another that often transcends the need for words.
Relationships: Lee Donghyuck | Haechan/Na Jaemin
Series: we don’t have to talk to click [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1846765
Comments: 4
Kudos: 123





	his confidant

**Author's Note:**

> I always think it's funny that people think Donghyuck and Jaemin don't like each other because personally when I watch them I think their friendship has to be pretty strong to be able to banter as easily and as comfortably as they do. _So_ , I'm hoping this piece will make others see their beautiful friendship in the positive light that I do. Enjoy!

Lee Donghyuck and Na Jaemin are very different in many ways - and yet they are _very_ similar in a plethora of other ways. The commonality in those similarities and the understanding of those differences is what makes their bond so special. 

In the beginning, they didn’t quite see eye to eye.

However, Jaemin likes to think that’s what made them what they are today. 

Back then, Donghyuck kind of liked to toe the line of the functionality of their relationship to see just how far he could push before he reached the edge of the Jaemin’s boundaries. And maybe once or twice, he crossed that line (sometimes unintentionally, sometimes not so much), but ultimately those times were what built the foundation of their relationship. 

Since then, Donghyuck has grown out of that constant need for that game of push and pull. He has since then grown to be understanding and observant of those around him, making him a great support to those close to him. He’s learned how to use his strengths of wits and his abundance of affection to make things more bright and bearable when everything else appears to be turning bleak in this crazy life of being idols. 

But there comes a point when he needs a moment to fade into the background - just for a while - when he needs someone else to be that beam of light for him. 

Donghyuck was given the name Haechan because of his bursting and bright personality, and he was and still is ecstatic to have such a name - so glad that he can be that “full sun” for others. However, sometimes that name can feel like such a heavy responsibility that sometimes he can’t always uphold. 

Sometimes, he forgets how to hang up the persona of Haechan and just be Donghyuck. 

Similarly, Jaemin finds himself with a responsibility to be that beaming personality for the Dream members. Haechan can’t be around all the time with his time being spread between two units, and Jaemin doesn’t want Haechan to bear that burden on his own. He’s more than willing to be the aegyo-filled, eccentric, and energetic member for the others. It’s not like it is completely out of character for him; he can be that persona for the cameras and the members when the situation calls for it. It’s just there comes a point when he needs to recharge.

Thankfully, Jaemin has learned somewhere along the way that when he crosses the threshold of their dorm that he can be the normal twenty-year-old Jaemin. Not NCT’s Jaemin. 

In this sense, Jaemin understands Donghyuck _all too well_. 

Jaemin is always willing and ready to be that soft beacon for Donghyuck. Always there to share a bit of the flame from his wick to rekindle Donghyuck’s flickering flame. 

;

It’s late at night when Donghyuck comes to him. Jaemin is still wide awake, looking through his catalog of photos that he has taken of his members. He’s sorting through which ones are usable and can actually be posted and separating them into folders to edit later. 

He hears a light knock on the doorframe, which is uncharacteristic for any of the members. 

He turns his head to find Donghyuck standing there timidly with a soft smile. 

It wouldn't be the first time that he has shown up like this, but it's definitely out of character for Donghyuck to look so timid when seeking Jaemin out for quality cuddles. He knows he doesn't have to be timid about these kinds of things with Jaemin. So, Jaemin can immediately sense that something's different about him today.

Something inherently softer and, dare he say, a bit more fragile and maybe even a bit hesitant. 

Jaemin observes his face closely. His eyes don’t have their usual sparkle. His cheeks don’t have their natural glow that Jaemin has come to adore so much about him. Donghyuck doesn’t have to say it, but Jaemin can tell he needs affection without the appearance of questions like: “Are you feeling okay?” or “Do you want to talk about it?” 

In this moment, he just needs affection without feeling like he’s burdening or worrying someone else unintentionally. And Jaemin gets it. 

There's also something else that is definitely bothering him that Jaemin hopes he can help him with later, using the right amount of comforting and placating. 

But in the meanwhile, Jaemin smiles back at him warmly. “Come lay down,” he turns back to the computer while he adds, “I was just finishing up with this, I’ll join you in a minute,” he says to reassure Donghyuck that he isn’t interrupting anything. 

He sees Donghyuck’s shoulders visibly sag in relief from the corner of his eye. He probably didn't even realize how tense he was. Jaemin softly smiles to himself as he saves his progress and closes out of his applications. 

When he thinks back to the way their relationship started all those years ago as two headstrong, stubborn trainees now to the place in their relationship that they are at now as two members of a debuted group finally achieving their dreams, he smiles brighter.

Still soft, but so much brighter.

He’s so happy they have grown to have the trust that they have with one another. So happy over the years they have built this kind of understanding. If you would’ve told fourteen-year-old Jaemin that all that conflict would establish the foundation of Donghyuck and his steady friendship, he would _never_ believe you. 

He’s just so happy to have Donghyuck as one of his best friends beside him in this whirlwind of a career. 

When he closes his laptop, he turns in his chair to smile at Donghyuck who’s already looking back at him with raised eyebrows and a pair of curious eyes. “Penny for your thoughts? Care to share what’s making you smile all cheesily?” He asks with a flicker of fondness. Jaemin catches it. 

Nothing passes between them. He responds with the same fondness. 

“I was just thinking about how we were as trainees,” he chuckles as he makes his way over to the bed. This certainly catches Donghyuck by surprise. 

He snorts in amusement. “Why on Earth would you be thinking about that? We were such a mess back then,” he giggles. 

“I know,” he agrees as he slides into the bed beside Donghyuck, slipping his arm around him and pulling him close. “But look at how close we are now,” he says softly in Donghyuck’s hair. 

Donghyuck immediately snuggles closer, tucking his head under Jaemin’s chin as his arm drapes over his waist. He hums in satisfaction. “Yeah, you’re right. Who would’ve thought?” 

“Certainly not me,” Jaemin teases.

“Shut up,” Donghyuck giggles as he pokes Jaemin in the ribs in reprimand. 

Jaemin pulls Donghyuck’s hand away, safely intertwining his fingers with his own to stop him from poking him again. “Don’t act like you weren’t thinking it, Duckie,” he mutters softly as he gently squeezes his hand to let him know he’s only teasing. 

Donghyuck squeezes his hand back before he burrows even further into Jaemin’s warm body. He always gives the best cuddles, so Donghyuck can’t stop himself from humming once again as he rubs his face against Jaemin’s soft shirt. 

“You’re doing that thing again where you act like a cat,” Jaemin teases and luckily he still has Donghyuck’s fingers locked with his so he can’t pester his ribs again. Instead, he does the next best thing, he whines high-pitched and sickeningly sweet. 

“Jaemin, shhh,” he hushes him. “You’re ruining the moment. You’re so much more charming when you aren’t talking.” 

“Ooh, so you think I’m charming,” he chuckles when Donghyuck attempts to lunge at him. “Okay, okay. I’ll stop,” he placates with a kiss to the crown of Donghyuck’s head. 

After a few moments, something seems to occur to Donghyuck. He slowly wiggles his way down to lay his head in Jaemin’s lap, so he can look him in the eyes without losing his warmth. “You called me Duckie,” he says oh so softly as he looks up at him. 

So soft, Jaemin almost misses it.

“Huh?” Jaemin blinks down at him confusedly before it clicks. “Oh. Yeah, I did,” he replies as he threads his fingers through Donghyuck’s hair. 

Donghyuck looks at him with a distant look in his eyes when he says, “No one has called me that in a long time.” Jaemin hums to let him know he’s listening. The honeyed boy eventually adds in a smaller voice, “Everyone only ever calls me Haechan now.”

Jaemin had done a good job of making Donghyuck forget why he’d come in the first place, but there are still lingering feelings below the surface. Feelings that Jaemin is ready to coax out of him and then hopefully disperse all that festered negative that he can sense that Donghyuck is harboring.

Jaemin carefully removes Donghyuck’s head from his lap so he can lay beside him. In this position, they can look at each other better. He looks at Donghyuck closely as he asks carefully, “Does that make you sad?”

He asks even though he can see the answer in his eyes. Jaemin knows that he just needs a little more coaxing to open up. He can tell that this is something that’s making his friend upset. 

Typically, when Donghyuck comes to him like this he doesn’t really want to talk about what’s bothering him, he just wants unbridled affection. It’s his way of recharging.

That’s why Jaemin knew the minute Donghyuck started speaking beyond their easy and familiar banter that this was something he’s been thinking about. And it’s probably been on his mind for a while. 

Donghyuck furrows his eyebrows as he really thinks about the way he’s feeling and how he would like to articulate those feelings. Eventually, he shakes his head no. “It doesn’t make me sad,” he says softly. “I mean I don’t think it does. That’s not it,” he tries to explain. Jaemin can tell he’s a little frustrated that he can’t find the words as usually, Donghyuck is great at voicing his opinion and thoughts.

“Take your time,” Jaemin reassures him as he pulls him a little closer. He rubs his back and he gives him a smile which he hopes will comfort him and encourage him to continue his train of thought. 

“What I mean is,” he says softly. “I like being Haechan. I really do, but sometimes it doesn’t seem so bad to just be Donghyuck you know?” And Jaemin does know. Haechan knows that Jaemin knows. It’s probably why he’s willing to be this open about it.

Jaemin is still comfortingly rubbing his back. “Yeah, I do know. You don’t have to be Haechan all the time. It’s okay to just be Donghyuck. No one expects you to be full sunshine all the time,” he smiles softly. “You know that, don’t you? We love you, for you. We love every part of you.”

Donghyuck looks back at him with a watery smile. “I know. It’s just sometimes it’s hard to let go of being “Haechan” when that part of me can make everyone happier. Even if it’s by a little, I’m glad that I can help.” 

And really it breaks Jaemin’s heart to hear it. He understands it, which makes it all the more heartbreaking. He’s felt this way before. He can see his friend stretching himself thin. Trying to be too many things at once. Trying to push down his feelings to focus on others’ feelings instead. And Jaemin knows that only ends badly. 

He is determined to stop it from festering before that can happen though. 

Jaemin pulls Donghyuck into his arms. He whispers into his hair. “But what about you, Duckie? What about your happiness?” 

That question seems to crack down the rest of the fragile wall Donghyuck has tried to build up.

Jaemin feels Donghyuck’s tears stain the front of his shirt as burrows his face into Jaemin’s chest. Jaemin embraces him even tighter as he says his next words - hoping they’ll plant a root in his heart and one day they’ll blossom and he’ll truly believe them. 

Jaemin will say them a hundred, a thousand times to nurture them like a plant owner fosters seeds of a fragile flower - until the roots are firm enough to support this thought in Donghyuck’s heart and mind. Just like all the heated-words, trials, and tribulations that became the foundation of their friendship. He hopes his words can become a foundation, too. 

“I understand that making other people happy makes you happy. Trust me I understand, you know I do. But Donghyuck you have to understand that your happiness matters too.” He pauses to kiss the top of his head before he whispers the next part. “Your happiness means so much too, Duckie.”

And after that, they just hold each other. Jaemin holds tight to keep the boy in his arms together. Donghyuck holding on just as tight to the relief and appreciation of being completely understood. 

Sometime much later when they’re both on the verge of falling asleep, Donghyuck finds just enough strength in his exhausted body to pull back to look at Jaemin. Jaemin steadily looks back at him. He notices that Donghyuck has that sparkle back in his eyes that he was searching for when he first came into his room earlier. It naturally makes a soft smile pull at the corner of Jaemin’s lips. 

“Thank you,” Donghyuck whispers before leaning in and kissing Jaemin on the cheek.

Jaemin kisses Donghyuck’s forehead in turn. “Always,” he reassuringly whispers back.

Donghyuck promptly tucks himself back beneath Jaemin’s chin, and Jaemin takes the time to say the words that the two don’t say to each other too often - they’re both more well versed in expressing themselves in actions rather than words - but at that moment he really wants Donghyuck to hear it.

“I love you, Duckie.”

And just before he falls asleep, he feels Donghyuck’s lips turn up into a small smile against the skin of his neck. 

  
  


♡̷̷

**Author's Note:**

> I thought about that one time that Donghyuck and Jaemin mentioned they had an argument or something along those lines when they were trainees, and it really got me thinking. I'm not claiming to know the dynamics of their relationship or anything, but I think a period like that could've made them closer because arguing tends to do that. You learn each other's ticks and it makes it easier to navigate the relationship to avoid those ticks and you gain mutual understanding. Also! They have a mutual love for physical affection. Like, hello? Okay, now I'm just rambling-
> 
> ...Point is, I think Jaemin and Donghyuck's friendship is beautiful!
> 
>   
> [twitter](https://twitter.com/holopandemonium%20rel=) | [curiouscat](https://curiouscat.me/storiesbysonny)


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